Alien Abduction Test

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ALIEN ABDUCTION TEST

CHECK YOUR CLOSE ENCOUNTER STATUS

Missing time? Strange memories? Unexplained fear of bright green lights?

The Alien Abduction Test is a funny, boxed novelty experience for anyone who suspects they may have had a close encounter they cannot quite explain.

CLAIM YOUR FREE DIGITAL ABDUCTION CERTIFICATE

    Generate Your Free Digital Abduction Certificate

    Customize your official Alien Abduction Test encounter record, then receive your personalized digital certificate by email.





    Subject Depiction

    Choose the figure shown on your encounter record.

    MaleFemale


    Complexion

    Choose the complexion that best matches how you’d like the encounter reconstruction to appear.


    Encounter Scene

    Examination ChamberTractor Beam RetrievalOnboard Encounter


    Result Classification

    Positive ResultClose Encounter ConfirmedWants To Be Abducted




    HOW IT WORKS

    HAVE YOU BEEN ABDUCTED?

    Maybe you woke up feeling like something happened.

    Maybe the clock skipped an hour.

    Maybe your neighbors have been acting suspiciously normal.

    One test may help explain your weirdest memories.

    WHAT’S INSIDE

    • Alien Abduction Test strip
    • Saliva collection materials
    • Close Encounter Incident Report
    • Instructions for your abduction-status check
    • QR access to claim your free digital certificate

    EASY AS 1-2-3

    1. OPEN THE POUCH
      Remove your Alien Abduction Test strip.
    2. PLACE SALIVA ON THE STRIP
      Follow the included instructions and submit your evidence.
    3. REVEAL YOUR ABDUCTION STATUS
      Study the results carefully. The truth may be out there.

    POSSIBLE RESULTS MAY INCLUDE

    • DEFINITELY ABDUCTED
    • PROBABLY ABDUCTED
    • MISSING TIME CONFIRMED
    • HUMANS WON’T BELIEVE YOU
    • NOT ABDUCTED… YET

    CLAIM YOUR FREE DIGITAL ABDUCTION CERTIFICATE

    Your investigation does not have to end with the test.

    Scan the QR code on your box, enter your details, and claim your official-looking Digital Abduction Certificate.

    Your certificate may include:

    • Your name
    • Your reported close-encounter status
    • An official-looking Alien DNA Test verification mark
    • A memorable keepsake for your evidence file

    [CERTIFICATE PORTAL COMING SOON]

    ALIENS DON’T LIE.

    TESTS DON’T EITHER.

    TRUST THE STRIP.
    TRUST THE TRUTH.
    (MAYBE.)

    GET YOUR ALIEN ABDUCTION TEST

    The Alien Abduction Test is coming soon.

    Join the investigation and be among the first to receive updates when the test becomes available.

    [GET PRODUCT UPDATES]

    IMPORTANT NOVELTY NOTICE

    Alien Abduction Test is a novelty gag product for entertainment purposes only. It is not a medical device and is not intended for diagnosis, screening, treatment, or proof of alien contact.